Do You Like Music?
Scene: JFK Airport, Hudson News, Terminal 7
A middle aged white woman buying a high-end cooking magazine asks a middle-aged black woman cashier:
"Do you like music?"
"Excuse me?"
"Do you like music?"
"Yea."
"You should go see Momma Mia. It is just so great!"
"Well OK, maybe I will. I need something to do this weekend. I work two jobs and this is my first weekend off in a long time."
"You're about my age, right? You will just love it!"
"OK, we'll I'll see. I work two jobs and it's been a long time since it worked out where I could get a weekend off from both."
"Oh, the singing is just great, you will love it! You have a nice day."
"All right, you too."
Throughout this entire conversation, I'm standing behind the woman in line, squirming out of my skin. How could this person be so oblivious to assume that the cashier working two jobs can just shoot into Manhattan and go to a Broadway show? The tickets are really expensive. The cashier most likely works two jobs because either of her jobs alone wouldn't be enough to get by. And what makes this customer think the cashier would want to spend her hard-earned money on Momma Mia tickets of all things? Would the cashier even want to see Momma Mia if it was free? Does she even know what Momma Mia is? Maybe more disturbing - what the hell kind of question is "Do you like music?" Who asks a question like that? Is there anyone in the world who doesn't like some sort of music? At this moment, I'm convinced that it's people like this who set race and class relations back decades. I genuinely feel bad for the cashier. She's working her ass off trying to get by, and she has to deal with horrible, insensitive, oblivious people like this customer on a daily, maybe hourly basis.
Well in the end, the actual story turned out much differently than the one I created in my head. As the cashier rung up my New York Times and pack of over-priced gum, I noticed something. She had a huge smile on her face and seemed genuinely happy. And this wasn't the kind of superficial happy we're all forced to show sometimes in social situations - this was the kind of happy you can't hide, no matter how hard you try. This was the kind of happy that beams far and wide and lights up a room.
I still think "Do you like music?" is a really stupid and perhaps condescending and self-serving question. I still think it's a dumb idea to assume strangers can, or would want to, see a Broadway show. But I couldn't have been more wrong about the result of this conversation. I assumed the cashier would be offended by the comments of the customer. I assumed the cashier would be annoyed with having to deal with a person like this. In reality, I couldn't have over-reacted or over-analyzed the situation more. This was just a woman working two jobs who was really looking forward to her first weekend off in a long time. Then again, maybe she was just excited to go see Momma Mia. At this point, who am I to assume anything?
You must have been having a real bad day and just couldn't take 2 other people being happy - the lady who saw the play and the cashier. We’re both in New York. You must encounter a hundred things just like this everyday, but I normally shake my head and move on. Not sure why this one got under your skin so much. I agree, this lady (and her topic of conversation) was just ridiculous, but so are most people walking around Greenwich Village. How about a few other annoying things, which are fresh in my mind at the moment:
1. the ultra-loud ipod listener who wants everyone on the subway to hear his/her music
2. pushy people who want to get on the subway, but will not let the passengers off because they think the train might leave without them…Trying to get off the train was like running the wrong way at the front of a marathon
3. the guy who insists on holding onto the subway railing with two spread out hands and legs (as if he’s getting arrested) and doesn’t move when more people pack onto the train, because he’s already reserved that spot.
4. the guy who can't wait 45 seconds for the next subway during rush hour. This guy feels that his life depends on getting on that one subway in the station that is already filled to capacity. He wants people to feel even more uncomfortable. He is usually sweating profusely and smells very bad.
5. the people on that already packed subway who insist on reading their NY Times or Wall Street Journal (opened up fully of course) and then look at you funny because you’re in ‘their’ way
6. other smelly people on the subway. Bad breath is rampant and it’s almost unbearable on the subway sometimes (like today)
There you have it. 6 things that really annoyed me this morning in NY, and that was just in a 10 minute span. I won’t get into the line for coffee afterwards…My point? I probably wasn’t going to tell anyone about these things until I read how upset you were at the lady trying to make conversation with the cashier. Sure, some people are idiots. But at least this lady was trying to be nice, even though she was clueless. There are many other people around that have every opportunity to do something nice, but don’t……That said, please continue to share your thoughts on other annoying people. It sure is nice to get a reminder of how not annoying I am.
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First of all, that was the point - I assumed they wouldn't be happy, but I was proven wrong in the end. Second of all, clueless people shouldn't get a free-pass just because their intention was to be nice. It's true they are much better than people with bad intentions, but that doesn't mean I can't complain about them. It also doesn't mean they're good for society.
This is a solid vent though. Having someone rant at me is very different than me anonymously ranting about politicians and strangers.
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